{"id":28298,"date":"2024-10-22T01:24:38","date_gmt":"2024-10-22T07:24:38","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.boundless.org\/?post_type=blog&p=28298"},"modified":"2024-10-23T15:13:22","modified_gmt":"2024-10-23T21:13:22","slug":"check-in-on-your-friends-who-are-pastors-they-might-not-be-ok","status":"publish","type":"blog","link":"https:\/\/www.boundless.org\/blog\/check-in-on-your-friends-who-are-pastors-they-might-not-be-ok\/","title":{"rendered":"Check In On Your Friends Who Are Pastors \u2014 They Might Not Be OK"},"content":{"rendered":"

I\u2019ve recently seen a new type of article in my newsfeeds. The title begins, \u201cCheck in on your friends \u2026\u201d and continues with \u201cwho have teens,\u201d \u201cwho work retail,\u201d \u201cwho are new parents\u201d \u2026 you get the idea. Why should you check in on them? \u201cThey might not be OK.\u201d<\/p>\n

October is Pastor Appreciation Month. And as a pastor\u2019s wife, I can say that this would be a great month to check in on your pastor. Here are four specific areas in which to encourage your pastor:<\/p>\n

1. Physically.<\/h4>\n

Our church does a good job of caring for its pastors. In fact, we received two meals this month from Angels in Aprons, our church\u2019s awesome meals ministry. But often pastors can be overlooked. People in the congregation may assume that many people are caring for the pastor and keeping an eye out for practical needs to be met.<\/p>\n

In Galatians 6:6<\/a> Paul writes: \u201cOne who is taught the word must share all good things with the one who teaches.\u201d The Bible sets a precedent for those being blessed by their pastor to give back.<\/p>\n

I have been on the receiving end of this many times. People have shared their vacation homes and camping gear with us. Others have given us gift cards to our favorite restaurants and stores. Families have blessed us with anonymous checks and by picking up our tab. Each of these gifts not only revealed the person\u2019s care for us but also God\u2019s provision through them.<\/p>\n

2. Emotionally.<\/h4>\n

When you see your pastors in the pulpit or greeting folks in the foyer, they probably seem happy, gracious and excited to serve. But pastoring can take an emotional toll. Your pastor is likely handling many heavy situations behind the scenes \u2014 most of them confidential. My experience has shown that pastors field far more complaints than compliments. Being a pastor can be a thankless job.<\/p>\n

I know it means a lot to my husband, Kevin, to receive a simple card that expresses appreciation, or an in-person \u201cthank you\u201d or compliment. A few days ago, some friends of ours called to tell Kevin that someone in their small group had been impacted by the sermon he\u2019d preached the previous Sunday.<\/p>\n

When it comes to the emotional health of your pastor, a little praise goes a long way. Even if you\u2019re yearning to offer some constructive criticism, try putting that on hold and look for something your pastor is doing right. Paul\u2019s exhortation to \u201cencourage one another<\/a>\u201d applies to pastors too! While they typically find themselves in the role of encourager, they are also in desperate need of encouragement themselves.<\/p>\n

3. Socially.<\/h4>\n

Being a pastor can be lonely. You can\u2019t exactly talk about \u201cwork\u201d problems at your Bible study. In some situations, you may even be viewed as a celebrity. (I remember not wanting to disturb the pastor of my large church in a coffee shop because I imagined that happened to him constantly.)<\/p>\n

Congregants may assume that the pastor has many friends and social invitations, but this may not be the case. I recall times when someone exclaimed that our family must have multiple invitations to Thanksgiving or Easter dinner, when we didn\u2019t have a single one. I\u2019ve had women at church express that I must have oodles of friends because my husband is a pastor. I do have friends, but no more than the average introvert (and I\u2019m always open to more).<\/p>\n

The truth is, social situations can be tough to navigate as a pastor. A beloved pastor\u2019s wife recently told me about how she wished she and her husband were invited to more social gatherings. If possible, invite your pastor over for a meal or to an event. At least strike up a conversation the next time you have the opportunity.<\/p>\n

4. Spiritually.<\/h4>\n

Pastors are constantly cranking out spiritual nourishment for others. Whether they counsel, preach or lead other staff members, spirituality is literally their job. This may lead us to believe that our pastors are doing great in their spiritual walks. I can think of multiple times where someone has expressed shock when I talk about having a particular struggle, such as envy or anger, because they assumed I was perfect.<\/p>\n

Checking in on your pastor spiritually could mean asking some questions. What has God been teaching you recently? What has He been laying on your heart? Are you feeling supported? Burned out? How can I encourage you in your calling?<\/em> The point of these questions isn\u2019t to interrogate, but to express that you care about your pastor\u2019s spiritual health.<\/p>\n

Perhaps the best way you can build up your pastors spiritually is to pray for them. Pray for their families. Pray that God would give them wisdom and humility. Pray that God would protect them from spiritual attack. Ask them how you can pray for them and then do it!<\/p>\n

Pastor Appreciation<\/h4>\n

Even if you think your pastor is doing fine, consider \u201cchecking in\u201d this month. Pastors have demanding but sacred (and God-given) jobs. Many of them put in long hours and sacrifice more than you ever see. Perhaps this is why God instructs us to show them double honor<\/a>.<\/p>\n

Find a way to encourage your pastors<\/a> this month. No matter how composed they acted at church on Sunday, they may not be OK. They may need someone to pat them on the back and tell them they\u2019re doing a good job. Also, a good meal or thoughtful gift never hurts.<\/p>\n

Copyright 2019 Suzanne Hadley Gosselin. All rights reserved.<\/em><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Even if you think your pastor is doing fine, consider \u201cchecking in\u201d this month. Pastors have demanding but sacred (and God-given) jobs.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":70,"featured_media":41814,"menu_order":0,"template":"","categories":[12,4,6],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-28298","blog","type-blog","status-publish","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-church","category-faith","category-life-with-others"],"yoast_head":"\nCheck In On Your Friends Who Are Pastors \u2014 They Might Not Be OK - Boundless<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"Even if you think your pastor is doing fine, consider \u201cchecking in\u201d this month. 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