{"id":29561,"date":"2024-02-13T01:24:44","date_gmt":"2024-02-13T08:24:44","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.boundless.org\/?post_type=blog&p=29561"},"modified":"2024-02-13T09:21:35","modified_gmt":"2024-02-13T16:21:35","slug":"why-im-still-single-this-valentines-day","status":"publish","type":"blog","link":"https:\/\/www.boundless.org\/blog\/why-im-still-single-this-valentines-day\/","title":{"rendered":"Why I\u2019m Still Single This Valentine\u2019s Day"},"content":{"rendered":"

\u201cAll I can figure is you just haven\u2019t met the right guy yet,\u201d my friend said. It was a nice thought, but hardly comforting as I \u2014 still very single \u2014 watched my younger, married friend take care of her infant.<\/p>\n

The summer I turned 20 I watched two of my childhood friends get married. In the years since, I\u2019ve been to countless weddings, with more and more of the brides and grooms being younger than me. Last year my (younger) brother got married and so did my (younger) best friend.<\/p>\n

I know there are many of you my age who would love to be married, but for whatever reason, are still single. As we approach another Valentine\u2019s Day without a significant other, we can trust that our being single is no accident.<\/p>\n

Not just a \u201creason\u201d for my singleness<\/h4>\n

Sometimes it feels easier to blame prolonged singleness on a particular \u201creason.\u201d We tell ourselves that perhaps we need to be more mature or learn more about seeking God. Maybe we should be more active in church or fulfill a specific mission or task that God\u2019s called us to.<\/p>\n

Any of these things could<\/em> be true, but that\u2019s a separate issue. The fact is, we don\u2019t earn marriage<\/a>. We all know couples who aren\u2019t as mature or prepared as they maybe should have been before tying the knot. Clearly God doesn\u2019t give marriage only to those who seem ready for it.<\/p>\n

If that\u2019s true, then maybe we\u2019re approaching this singleness thing all wrong. Maybe it\u2019s not about pinpointing the problem and fixing it so God can \u201creward\u201d us with a spouse. Maybe our singleness isn\u2019t something that needs to be fixed.<\/p>\n

I recently heard a speaker talk about her own extended singleness and the purpose God has in it. Call me observant, but that\u2019s when it hit me: God has a purpose for my singleness.<\/p>\n

Maybe it was just the way I heard her message in that moment, but \u201dpurpose\u201d feels so much deeper to me than a simple explanation for why I\u2019m still single. If I\u2019m only single for a reason<\/em>, then maybe I need to find out what that reason is and solve it. But if I\u2019m single for a purpose<\/em>, then singleness is not something to find a way out of \u2014 it is the best place for me to be right now.<\/p>\n

This Valentine\u2019s Day, there are two reasons why purpose in being single gives me \u2014 and all of us \u2014 hope.<\/p>\n

1. God is sovereign over my singleness<\/strong><\/p>\n

We know the verses. Jeremiah 29:11 tells us God has prosperous plans<\/a> for us, and in Romans 8:28, God promises that everything that happens to one of his children will ultimately be for our good<\/a>. Everything.<\/p>\n

But sometimes things don\u2019t seem to be working out for our good. Sometimes we wonder why God doesn\u2019t act on our timeframe or do what we think is best for us.<\/p>\n

Even in those times, we can know that God is in control of the situation.<\/p>\n

Jesus calmed the storm and fed the crowds and raised the dead. He even defeated sin and death, forever proving that nothing can stop God\u2019s plan.<\/p>\n

While I may not be where I had planned to be, I can think of times in my life when God clearly guided me to where I am now. Knowing that he intentionally has me here gives so much peace.<\/p>\n

2. God is good in my singleness<\/strong><\/p>\n

It\u2019s a famous quote, but for good reason. In C.S. Lewis\u2019 classic, \u201cThe Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe,\u201d the concerned Pevensie children ask Mr. Beaver if this famed lion, Aslan, is safe.<\/p>\n

\u201cSafe?\u201d said the beaver. \u201cWho said anything about safe? \u2018Course he isn\u2019t safe. But he\u2019s good.\u201d<\/p>\n

He. Is. Good.<\/p>\n

God sent His Son to redeem us from the mess we had gotten ourselves into. If He was willing to do something so drastic for our eternal destiny, how can we ever question His goodness and love in something as comparatively trivial as our earthly marital status?<\/p>\n

\u201cRemember this: Had any other condition been better for you than the one in which you are, divine love would have put you there,\u201d Charles Spurgeon wrote in one of his devotionals. \u201c[T]he Lord has ordered all things for your good.\u201d<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

It\u2019s not that God chooses only some children to bless, giving them marriage while withholding it from the rest of us. He loves us all and is good to us all. We all receive gifts from Him in whatever life stage we\u2019re in.<\/p>\n

Either way, it\u2019s all good<\/h4>\n

Paul wrote that God has prepared good works<\/a> for us. For many of us, for right now, those works are meant to be lived out in a life of singleness. This may not be the case for the rest of my life or your life. Or maybe it will. Either way, we can trust that God is sovereign, and He is good.<\/p>\n

This Valentine\u2019s Day, God is quite aware that you and I are still single. And He\u2019s OK with that. Are we?<\/p>\n

Copyright 2020 Lauren Dunn. All rights reserved.<\/em><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

This Valentine\u2019s Day, God is quite aware that you and I are still single. And He\u2019s OK with that. Are we?<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":70,"featured_media":40126,"menu_order":0,"template":"","categories":[8],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-29561","blog","type-blog","status-publish","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-being-single"],"yoast_head":"\nWhy I\u2019m Still Single This Valentine\u2019s Day - Boundless<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"This Valentine\u2019s Day, God is quite aware that you and I are still single. And He\u2019s OK with that. 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