{"id":33364,"date":"2020-11-24T04:44:20","date_gmt":"2020-11-24T11:44:20","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.boundless.org\/?post_type=blog&p=33364"},"modified":"2024-05-06T09:46:15","modified_gmt":"2024-05-06T15:46:15","slug":"grammy-winner-mandisa-finds-community-as-a-christian-single","status":"publish","type":"blog","link":"https:\/\/www.boundless.org\/blog\/grammy-winner-mandisa-finds-community-as-a-christian-single\/","title":{"rendered":"Grammy Winner Mandisa Finds Community as a Christian Single"},"content":{"rendered":"

I was 22 when I moved to Colorado from my home state of Washington. Fresh out of college, I easily found friends in my same stage of life through church and work. But a decade later, I began to notice that making friends and finding connections wasn\u2019t as easy as it used to be. In fact, it required real effort as a still-single adult to cultivate meaningful community in my 30s. And, to be honest, sometimes the effort didn\u2019t seem worth it.<\/p>\n

A few weeks ago, I had the chance to talk to Christian music artist Mandisa<\/a>. Known for being an \u201cAmerican Idol\u201d season five finalist and Grammy award-winning singer, Mandisa is also a 44-year-old single woman with a passion for community. \u201cDuring this pandemic, I\u2019ve seen even more the importance of relationships,\u201d she said during our visit. \u201cWe need each other. God does beautiful things in the context of community. The enemy wants to divide us and isolate us \u2014 but that\u2019s where he gets a foothold.\u201d<\/p>\n

As I chatted with Mandisa, she opened up about her own need for community and how she cultivates relationships. Here\u2019s what she had to say:<\/p>\n

Don\u2019t be a \u201cLone Ranger\u201d Christian.<\/h4>\n

\u201cSomething I hear from people a lot is, \u2018I have Jesus, and He\u2019s all I need.\u2019 And I say, \u2018No, that\u2019s dangerous thinking.\u2019 God created us for community. We are the body of Christ<\/a>, and that includes everyone. I\u2019m an introvert, so staying home and binge-watching TV can be a real temptation (especially during a pandemic), but I\u2019ve learned that\u2019s not healthy for me. I end up feeling isolated and getting discouraged. As someone whose default is to isolate, community is not something that will just happen naturally for me; it\u2019s something I have to pursue. And I\u2019ve had to make choices (such as where I live and how I spend my time) to cultivate those relationships and make them a priority.\u201d<\/p>\n

Pray and ask God for a friend.<\/h4>\n

\u201cGod is all about relationships. I think He loves it when we come to Him with our emotional and social needs, not just our physical ones. Many people pray for God to provide a spouse \u2014 I do, too \u2014 but what about praying for Him to provide friends who can encourage us in our lives right now? Community is so important to Him, and He wants us to partner with Him in praying for and building those meaningful relationships with others.\u201d<\/p>\n

Make the first move.<\/h4>\n

\u201cAs you\u2019re praying, the Lord may prompt you to say something to somebody, which can feel uncomfortable. But asking someone to have coffee or go out for dinner can also be really rewarding. Little kids are great<\/em> at making friends. Why? Because they don\u2019t overthink it. They\u2019re not afraid to just go up to someone and say, \u2019Hi, will you be my friend?\u2019 I love it when someone does this for me, but I also want to be the one to make the first move sometimes.\u201d<\/p>\n

Be open to friends who are different from you.<\/h4>\n

\u201cThroughout my life I\u2019ve been drawn into friendships with a variety of people. Anytime I look at pictures of me with the people I hang out with, I see men, women, singles, married folks, old, young, and every age in between. God has blessed me with a diverse group of friends \u2014 mentors from my church, singers I\u2019ve been on tour with, fellow artists and influencers, stay-at-home moms, the woman who trains my puppy. You learn so much and become a richer person by surrounding yourself with people who aren\u2019t like you. As I\u2019ve walked through hard things in my life, I\u2019ve sometimes been surprised by the people God has used in my life. Through the years, He\u2019s worked powerfully through some unlikely but sweet friends.\u201d<\/p>\n

***<\/p>\n

As I talked with Mandisa, I was reminded of a story from my own life. Five years ago, I moved to a new town and had to begin the process of making friends all over again. I joined a Bible study at my church, which was composed of women of all ages and stages of life. One week a woman in her early 30s attended our study with her mom. I found out she had grown up in this town but had traveled around as a nurse for the past decade. One night, during prayer request time, she asked us to pray that she would find friends and community. From across the room, I blurted, \u201cI\u2019ll be your friend!\u201d<\/p>\n

Even though the gesture was a bit awkward (and unlike me, actually), it began a sweet friendship that is going strong to this day. If you\u2019re longing for community, ask God for good friends, then look for opportunities to reach out and make the first move. As Mandisa reminded me, community is beautiful, and it\u2019s worth the effort.<\/p>\n

You can keep up with Mandisa on Instagram @mandisaofficial<\/a> and @morningswithmandisa<\/a>.<\/em><\/p>\n

Copyright 2020 Suzanne Hadley Gosselin. All rights reserved.<\/em><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

As Mandisa reminded me, community is beautiful, and it\u2019s worth the effort.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":70,"featured_media":40857,"menu_order":0,"template":"","categories":[8,6],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-33364","blog","type-blog","status-publish","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-being-single","category-life-with-others"],"yoast_head":"\nGrammy Winner Mandisa Finds Community as a Christian Single - Boundless<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"As Mandisa reminded me, community is beautiful, and it\u2019s worth the effort. 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