{"id":43810,"date":"2025-09-24T01:25:18","date_gmt":"2025-09-24T07:25:18","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.boundless.org\/?post_type=blog&p=43810"},"modified":"2025-08-15T14:33:24","modified_gmt":"2025-08-15T20:33:24","slug":"the-girl-next-door","status":"publish","type":"blog","link":"https:\/\/www.boundless.org\/blog\/the-girl-next-door\/","title":{"rendered":"The Girl Next Door"},"content":{"rendered":"

Have you ever felt your prayers were unheard, only to realize months \u2014 or years \u2014 later they were being answered in ways you couldn\u2019t see?<\/p>\n

When many of my friends sought short-term relationships, I wanted a life-long commitment, often daydreaming about my future wife and our family. But after years of praying for the Lord to reveal my bride, I wondered if I would ever marry.<\/p>\n

By 25, I was scared and seriously doubting I would find a wife. I was dating a girl at the time, and though she seemed like my last hope, I knew we were about to break up; the relationship just wasn\u2019t right. I didn\u2019t settle, but continued to pray<\/a>.<\/p>\n

Perhaps you are where I was. You feel time is running out for your happily ever after, but know the idea of staying in a bad relationship to avoid being alone or for the sake of getting married is not the definition of love or longevity.<\/p>\n

I\u2019ve seen too many people make the mistake of seeing a potential mate for who they want<\/em> them to be instead of who they are<\/em>. Imaginations of marital bliss are fine and expected, but future realities can be seen in today\u2019s behaviors, not tomorrow\u2019s hopes. Compromising only makes lifelong commitment difficult and always leaves you wondering what could have been.<\/p>\n

Preparation in the waiting<\/h4>\n

Since I didn\u2019t want to force a relationship and was well aware of my own shortcomings, I decided to improve the one thing I knew I could control \u2013 me.<\/p>\n

People attract what they already are. Too often singles expect others to be what they are not or fill in the gaps where they are personally lacking. Great relationships have complementary strengths and weaknesses for balance, but it doesn\u2019t remove the responsibility to always strive for self-growth.<\/p>\n

Rather than spending time thinking about who I wanted my future wife to be, I put that energy into learning and growing into the person God wanted me to be. Before I could be a husband who loves his wife as Christ loves the church, I had to be a man who loves the Lord.<\/p>\n

The foundation you build in Christ now will be the foundation of your future marriage. It\u2019s what you will lean on when you experience hardships and your vows are tested.<\/p>\n

Trust God\u2019s timing<\/h4>\n

During this time of waiting on God\u2019s answer, I still doubted whether marriage was in my future. But I continued to pray, trusting the Lord\u2019s goodness and timing.<\/p>\n

Then something unexpected happened. Through a simple introduction by my sister, I met Missy. She was kind, beautiful, and shared the faith and values I had been praying for in a wife. As we talked, I learned that for years she had been spending time at her aunt\u2019s house \u2014 right next door to my parents’ home.<\/p>\n

How could I have failed to see her as I drove by? Why did I never meet her when I spent time with my parents? It seemed almost unimaginable that all those years praying for my future wife, she was right next door.<\/p>\n

Answered prayers are often close, yet unseen. Sometimes they\u2019re even forfeited because we trust our feelings rather than the Lord\u2019s plan.<\/p>\n

Maybe you\u2019re reading this and longing for the perfect person to walk into your life. Like me, maybe you\u2019re on the verge of giving up. I can\u2019t stress to you enough the importance of waiting and trusting the Lord\u2019s timing. As you wait, focus on self-growth that will develop you into a God-honoring, loving spouse. Identify areas in which you need to mature. Live your life in a manner that is honoring to God and your future spouse. Grow closer to the Lord and trust Him with the longings of your heart.<\/p>\n

Perseverance is critical in life. Because I waited for Missy and the partnership God had for us doesn\u2019t mean our life together has been easy. We\u2019ve endured difficult times together; the death of parents, a child with an incurable disease, and countless months in and out of hospitals are just sips of the pain we have shared. We have been broken financially, emotionally and even spiritually, but we never gave up because love never quits.<\/p>\n

I can\u2019t imagine doing life with anyone but Missy, and I can\u2019t imagine what my life would\u2019ve been like had I decided to shortcut God\u2019s timing. I hope my story encourages you. Stand strong<\/a>. Pray, grow, and wait. While the waiting may be difficult now, it is worth it.<\/p>\n

Copyright 2025 Jay Lowder. All rights reserved.\u00a0<\/em><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Marriage isn\u2019t guaranteed to any of us, but trusting God\u2019s timing and stewarding singleness well always brings fruitfulness \u2014 and sometimes an unexpected match. <\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":102,"featured_media":43812,"menu_order":0,"template":"","categories":[3,8,5],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-43810","blog","type-blog","status-publish","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-adulthood","category-being-single","category-dating"],"yoast_head":"\nThe Girl Next Door - Boundless<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"Marriage isn\u2019t guaranteed to any of us, but waiting on God\u2019s timing and stewarding singleness well always brings fruitfulness.\" \/>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.boundless.org\/blog\/the-girl-next-door\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"The Girl Next Door\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"Marriage isn\u2019t guaranteed to any of us, but waiting on God\u2019s timing and stewarding singleness well always brings fruitfulness.\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/www.boundless.org\/blog\/the-girl-next-door\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"Boundless\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:publisher\" content=\"https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/boundless.org\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:image\" content=\"https:\/\/www.boundless.org\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/08\/the-girl-next-door-689f9640422ff.webp\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:width\" content=\"1500\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:height\" content=\"1000\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:type\" content=\"image\/webp\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:card\" content=\"summary_large_image\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:label1\" content=\"Est. reading time\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data1\" content=\"4 minutes\" \/>\n<script type=\"application\/ld+json\" class=\"yoast-schema-graph\">{\"@context\":\"https:\/\/schema.org\",\"@graph\":[{\"@type\":\"WebPage\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.boundless.org\/blog\/the-girl-next-door\/\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/www.boundless.org\/blog\/the-girl-next-door\/\",\"name\":\"The Girl Next Door - Boundless\",\"isPartOf\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.boundless.org\/#website\"},\"primaryImageOfPage\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.boundless.org\/blog\/the-girl-next-door\/#primaryimage\"},\"image\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.boundless.org\/blog\/the-girl-next-door\/#primaryimage\"},\"thumbnailUrl\":\"https:\/\/www.boundless.org\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/08\/the-girl-next-door-689f9640422ff.webp\",\"datePublished\":\"2025-09-24T07:25:18+00:00\",\"description\":\"Marriage isn\u2019t guaranteed to any of us, but waiting on God\u2019s timing and stewarding singleness well always brings fruitfulness.\",\"breadcrumb\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.boundless.org\/blog\/the-girl-next-door\/#breadcrumb\"},\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"ReadAction\",\"target\":[\"https:\/\/www.boundless.org\/blog\/the-girl-next-door\/\"]}]},{\"@type\":\"ImageObject\",\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.boundless.org\/blog\/the-girl-next-door\/#primaryimage\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/www.boundless.org\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/08\/the-girl-next-door-689f9640422ff.webp\",\"contentUrl\":\"https:\/\/www.boundless.org\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/08\/the-girl-next-door-689f9640422ff.webp\",\"width\":1500,\"height\":1000,\"caption\":\"two doors representing neighbors that are waiting to meet each other\"},{\"@type\":\"BreadcrumbList\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.boundless.org\/blog\/the-girl-next-door\/#breadcrumb\",\"itemListElement\":[{\"@type\":\"ListItem\",\"position\":1,\"name\":\"Blog Posts\",\"item\":\"https:\/\/www.boundless.org\/blog\/\"},{\"@type\":\"ListItem\",\"position\":2,\"name\":\"The Girl Next Door\"}]},{\"@type\":\"WebSite\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.boundless.org\/#website\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/www.boundless.org\/\",\"name\":\"Boundless\",\"description\":\"Find your place. 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